New year, same wardrobe?

Madonna wants her ‘90s fashion trends back

In the year 2016, masses of people brought back fashion trends that we hope had died in the past. Unfortunately, we were wrong. Everything from “mom jeans” to chokers to the funky “t-shirt-over-dress style” has been horrifically spread like a deadly plague throughout the vast world of fashion and style.

Don’t get me wrong; slips over t-shirts may sound pretty darn cute in any teenager’s mind who desperately hopes their style is unique and groovy, but they are a heinous reminder of the the extremely embarrassing time period of the ’90s in which the United States hit rock bottom in the fashion industry. The craze might have been popular and modish for a minute, but now it just reeks of a lack of originality and creativity. It is highly recommended by people who seem to have a great taste in clothing that a slip and a t-shirt be worn separately at all times to avoid any chance of running into a teenage girl with the same exact outfit as you.

On the other hand, although chokers were over-popularized in the ’90s, they have made a rather positive comeback in the past year. A choker has the capability of choosing between life and death for any person who fastens this tight necklace around their neck. That is, a choker has such a strong influence that it will decide between life and death for a person’s outfit. It can either destroy an individual’s outfit that took several tedious hours to put together, or it can complement an individual’s attire. For the first time in history, America has brought back a fashion trend that actually doesn’t look like it came straight out of a cheesy ‘90s magazine. They are now available in a countless numbers of colors and textures and have somehow made the impossible happen; they are even more appealing and charming than they were when they were originally made!

So, fellow fashionistas of America, I encourage you all to find the style that suits you best. The harsh truth is that when you are about 30 and looking back at pictures of your time in high school, you will most likely regret showing up to a graduation ceremony with the choker the size of a neck cast around your neck.